I Wasn't Prepared - Eisley

its funny aye (haha so aussie accent to use the word "aye") how much time flies, and how you once thought you might not have made it this far. its funny how life always has its way of working out, even in the dimmest of situations, its just about holding on until the sun shines again. everything really happens for a reason. i never once doubted that. exams are round the corner, and work seems to be relatively good, or maybe im having more perseverance for all the hard effort im putting in, i might as well, since im gonna go on break soon to study for my exams. i really am starting to feel real comfortable and happy here in aussie, my group of frens, the close ones even, really feel so grateful each and everyday for the frens i made here, and my studies and my work. i feel so great knowing i am succeeding in the things i set out to do. suddenly i realized it really wasnt that difficult. i tend to do that, as what mum always says, i tend to underestimate myself a lot. making myself feel im not good enough or whatever. but i am. and i just know that i can do whatever i set out to do. im really happy things are so great with me now, with my studies, my work and him being there for me. it was really sweet what he has done to win me back, and im glad to be his again. i hate when we fight especially its hard cos i have noone really to cry to when im sad. but it gets better, and he realizes sooner or later, and i love him so much for that. he makes so much effort to really understand in the best way he can, and i will never take that for granted. i just got back from a party, my colleague and close companion, thao invited me to. it was really fun and all, but i realized something. im that girl that sits in a corner, not drinking, looking on from the background. its weird, cos it took me so long to be that girl. no more loudness for me, a bit of innocent fun here and there but suddenly the main fun and games of a party din seem to interest me that much. i used to be someone else, but suddenly im not that person anymore. all i was thinking abt was getting home and having some peace and quiet. i know, i sound like an old granny already. but i dunnoe, things are changing for me. changing real fast, and for the first time in my life, im ready to embrace them. i am no longer afraid of changes. and thats one of the things that i'm really happy about.