Stop and Stare - One Republic

a simple weekend of rest and relaxation was all i needed. no fuss, no worries, no work. just me myself and him. we din have to go out, or have any expensive dinners. all i wanted was to spend quality time with him and relax, cos my previous week was BRUTAL.

we found a fantastic indian stall by the roadside near aljunied mrt station, and man, the food was 'A' list. truly authentic north indian food. we had the most delicious garlic and butter naan which was as big as my face, with tandoori, mutton and potatoes... i will definitely go back there w sweets. (:

on sat i went back to TP for the O'level seminar to listen to this girl talk, a graduate of TP who's doing extremely well in her phD, and who is going exactly in the same direction i want to take. After sweets and i laughed at all the dancers on stage and the student representatives sucking it up for the O' level students, I then decided to approach her and have a lil chat with her, talk about tips and some advice. she's alright. not like she made me feel very impressed, but she did give me good advice. felt a mixture of good and bad, good cos now at least my direction seems clearer, but bad cos now i'm feeling the pressure. man, i dreamt of her last night trying to introduce me to this director which seems to look like my big boss at work. haha. funny.

well, at least i'm trying my best to make sure everything's all ready for me once i get to aussie. sometimes i think i do too much, really go all out for it. people always telling me to chill and that things will work out, but its just not me to go with the flow. i want to maximize everything i've got and have no regrets. of cos when my plan backfires, i take it very hard. thats why mum is always saying being ambitious is good, but being over-ambitious creates unnecessary pressure. but pressure is what i need right? if not where will i get the motivation from.

cant believe it, 6 more weeks. after waiting almost 5 years. its just 6 weeks away. its an exhilarating feeling but at the same time a deep sinking feeling, cos i know i gotta let go of things and readjust all over again. can i do it? i ask myself this every single day. i know ppl wont understand why i'm so caught up in this. but i know its my dream, so i cant be limited by what other people think. I only can know how high my sky is. Only I can set my boundaries. Only I can believe in myself.